What is 20 of men get 80 of women?

The statement "20% of men get 80% of women" is a crude and harmful misrepresentation of relationships and attraction, often associated with concepts within the manosphere. It suggests that a small percentage of men are highly successful with women, while the majority are not.

Here's a breakdown of why this statement is problematic:

• Oversimplification of attraction: Attraction is complex and multifaceted. It's influenced by personality, compatibility, shared interests, communication skills, emotional intelligence, physical appearance (subjective and varied), and many other factors. Reducing it to a simple percentage diminishes its complexity.

• Promotion of toxic masculinity: This idea often goes hand-in-hand with harmful beliefs about masculinity, promoting the idea that men should strive to be dominant and manipulative to attract women. It reinforces stereotypes and disregards healthy relationship dynamics.

• Misogyny and objectification: It treats women as a prize to be won, objectifying them and disregarding their agency and autonomy in choosing partners. It implies that women are a homogenous group with a single set of preferences, which is false.

• Inaccurate representation of relationship dynamics: Relationships are based on mutual respect, consent, and genuine connection. This statement implies a transactional view of relationships, where women are rewards to be obtained.

• Focus on quantity over quality: The statement prioritizes the number of women a man can "get" rather than the quality of his relationships. It promotes a superficial and unhealthy approach to dating and relationships.

• Promotion of incel ideology: This type of thinking can contribute to the incel (involuntary celibate) ideology, which blames women for men's lack of romantic success and can lead to resentment and even violence.

• Ignoring individual agency: This assertion ignores the fact that individuals, both men and women, have agency in choosing their partners and relationships. It implies that women are simply objects to be obtained by a select few men.

• Reinforcement of harmful stereotypes: This statement reinforces damaging stereotypes about men and women, perpetuating unrealistic expectations and hindering the development of healthy relationships.

• Correlation vs. Causation Fallacy: Even if there's a statistical observation that seems to support this claim in specific contexts, it doesn't establish a causal relationship. Other factors like social dynamics, geographical location, and personal preferences play a significant role.

• Ignoring Diversity in Attraction: The factors that attract someone varies widely based on their cultural background, personal values, and individual preferences. A universal statement like this ignores this vast diversity.

• Perpetuation of Competition: This claim fosters an environment of competition among men, suggesting that they are in a constant battle for the attention of women, undermining camaraderie and cooperation.

• Disregard for Emotional Connection: True relationships are built upon emotional intimacy, shared vulnerabilities, and mutual support. This statement overlooks the significance of emotional connection.

• Neglecting the Role of Compatibility: Compatibility, in terms of values, life goals, and personality traits, is crucial for long-term relationships. The '20/80' rule dismisses the importance of compatibility.

• Contribution to Unrealistic Expectations: By portraying a skewed picture of the dating landscape, this statement sets up both men and women for unrealistic expectations about their romantic prospects.

• Reinforcement of Power Imbalances: The statement indirectly suggests a power dynamic where a few men hold all the cards in the dating world, reinforcing harmful power imbalances.

• Denial of Personal Growth: The implication that only a select few can achieve romantic success discourages personal growth and self-improvement for the majority of men.

• Undermining Self-Esteem: Hearing or believing this statement can negatively affect the self-esteem of both men and women, leading to feelings of inadequacy.

• Dismissal of Alternative Lifestyles: The statement focuses on heterosexual relationships and neglects alternative relationship styles and orientations.

• Ignoring the Role of Timing: The right timing in life, personal readiness for a relationship, and external circumstances play a vital role in forming connections, which this statement disregards.